Some Whacky News to Lighten Up the Day

These stories courtesy of www.stunning-stuff.com.Not the latest news, but whacky.

Drag Queen Burglar

A student of the University of South Florida had a nice surprise when she returned home to see a burglar passed out in her laundry room wearing her own clothes. It seems he had helped himself to some beers and food while at it.

I guess he must have been a fan of Goldilocks. Hey, why stop at sleeping in the beds when you can also wear the clothes

Potty Thieves

A couple of thieves in Belarus decided to make off with a public toilet, while a man was already in it going about his business. He later managed to get out of it and alert the police.

My question is, WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO STEAL A TOILET??? I mean geez…is that town so deprived of valuable items that thieves have to resort to stealing loos? What’s the world coming to when a person can’t take a poo in peace?

'Wrong way' driver warns police about 'wrong way' drivers

A 86-year-old gramps from Bern, Switzerland, took a wrong turn while driving and ended up going the wrong way on a highway. Of course grandpa can never be wrong, So he complained to the police about all the other people who were going the wrong way. The police drove him home and are now contemplating whether to take his license away (you think?)

The nerve of these youngsters today, driving the wrong side of the road...hmph...

Thief with a heart of Gold

A thief in Brazil returned a car he stole after hearing the owners personal troubles. The owner called his own mobile phone which was left inside the car and made an emotional plea to the thief about his financial trouble, and the thief was so moved that he parked the car and told the owner where he could pick it up.

What a nice guy eh? I'm guessing that this guy is unlikely to have a long career in the thieving business.

Fish 'n Chips Burglar

A woman in Holland was woken up in the middle of the night by the smell of frying fish. When she went downstairs, she found a man frying fish in her kitchen. The man also admitted to taking a Beer and some drinks to compliment the Fish dinner.

Man whatever happened to good ole' steal your valuables kinda thieves?

Shopper fined for not carrying basket in Supermarket

It seems its a law at the Edah supermarkets in Netherlands, that shoppers must carry a basket when shopping, even if your buying one item. One guy refused and was arrested and fined $185.00. The reason for this law is to reduce shoplifting.
(Paranoid much?)

Junior Don Juan

A school in Branson Missouri suspended a 9-year-old under the schools sexual harassment policy for kissing another student, on the cheek.

That dirty little bastard. How dare he. Doesn't he know that only teachers are allowed to kiss at school.

Tattoo Ads

A woman has auctioned off her forehead space for $10,000 to place a tattoo for a gambling site. The site her $10,000 asking price and added another $5000 into the aggreement. She says it's a lot of money for her and a small price to pay for sending her son to a private school. In a wierd way, it's a tale of a mothers love.

Hmmm...Wonder how much I can get for arm space?


Cheers y'all, have a good week ahead :)

Yet another twisted nursery rhyme – Jack and Jill

I haven't done one of these in a long while, so here goes...:D
---

Jack and Jill went up the hill
To buy a bottle of grog,
They huffed and puffed
All the way up
To see the man
Who made the grog,
A rickety little hut
Stood at the top
With broken chimneys
Billowing puffy smoke,
Bang went the door
And out he came,
Rolly polly with a bouncy gait
A big bushy moustache
Under a knobby nose,
With a one-toothed grin
He welcomed them in
‘Hello lady and gent,
Welcome to my castle,
Come, share my grog
Tis the best
Wherever you go’,

‘Moldy grapes and, rotting Apples,
All in the barrel with festering peaches,
An eye of Newt,
A foot of Toad ,
And dried Batwings galore,
Round them all off
With a pinch of KCN,
That’s the secret to my grog
The best you’ll taste
In all the world',
He made an offer
They couldn’t refuse,
And six bottles full
They bought from him,
‘One for Pappy
One for Mammy
And four bottles full
For you and me',

Jack and Jill
Went down the hill,
Happy as bunnies
On a long summers day,
They opened a bottle,
Took a few sips,
And before they knew
The world was spinning,
‘Look at the pretty colors
All floating around’
They cried all the way
Tumbling down,
A very steep hill,
Broken bones and
Purple bruisers
They weren’t a pretty sight,
But worry not
The precious was safe,
Laid up in bed
They sipped the grog,
And spent their days
In an euphoric daze

Cars, cars and more cars…

The Toronto Autoshow 2009 is on from the 13th of February to the 22nd so made it a number one priority go see it. While the lovers were frolicking away on v-day, the rest of us decided to go see some other beautiful ladies ;) and boy, aren’t they awesome.

www.autoshow.ca

Updated with names (where i can remember them :) )

Ford Thunderbird from the 1950s’


2009 Rolls Royce Phantom


2007 Shelby Cobra GT500 (Yep, this is the new KITT)


2007 Shelby Cobra GT500

Ford Mustang


2009 Suzuki Swift

2009 Suzuki Swift

Subaru


Subaru G4E Concept

Subaru G4E Concept

Mazda MX 5

Mazda 6

Mazda 3

Porsche Cayenne

Porsche Carrera

Maserati

Maserati

Lotus

Lamborghini

Lamborghini

Lamborghini

2009 Jaguar XJ

2009 Jaguar XKR-S


2009 Jaguar XF

Honda Concept

Honda Concept

Honda Concept

Hummer H2

Ford Super Heavy Duty Truck

Ford Super Heavy Duty Truck

Ford Super Heavy Duty Truck

Ferrari Spider

Ferrari

Ferrari Spider

1977 Corvette Stingray

2000’s Corvette

1950’s Cadilac

1950’s Cadilac

2009 Bentley Continental Flying Spur Speed

Aston Martin DBS

Flying on Snow

Last Saturday was an exciting day because I had my first taste of Skiing, and it was fun. The place is called the Blue Mountain Resort, located near a town called Collingwood. It’s about 150km North of Toronto. Five of us from the office rented a car and made there in about 2 hours. The place has packages for ski rentals and provides instructors for beginners as well.

We’ve all seen those cool looking skiers and snowboarders gliding down snowy mountain trail, who makes it look easy as ABC. Well it ain’t that easy if you are trying it for the first time. First of all wearing those ski boots are like wearing a plaster casts, and walking around in them is murder. Took sometime to figure out the trick is to take long strides placing the heel first. And don’t get me started on getting up and down stairs. Basically walked around like a duck with a bad limp. These special boots are needed because they are made to clip on to the skis, and keep them on you.

The skis themselves may look like thin pieces of wood, but they are quite heavy. From what I can find out, a pair might weigh something upwards of 2kg.

Well after getting the basics, tried my luck on the baby slopes. Happy to say that I managed to stay on my feet, well let’s just say, most of the time anyway. Didn’t get the hang of how to steer, but as long as it is a straight run, I can manage. :D

It’s really awesome to see little kids skiing and snowboarding down some of the higher slopes. Man, those kids must be born with skis on them.

On a more warmer note, the weather is turning and it’s getting warmer now. Snow is starting to melt and it’s nice to see sporadic patches of green in a sea of white.








Cheers!!!