Why do bus conductors charge fares from clergy and not from cops?

Shouldn’t it be the other way around?

Guess that’s the way we are programmed. Suck up to authority and be safe. After all, the policeman can make trouble for you, while what can clergy do? Damn you to hell? Most people are already there so it won’t matter to them.

It’s very rarely I’ve seen a bus conductor not charge clergy. Saw it yesterday, hence the post. On the other hand, never have I seen a cop being asked for money. Bus conductors who normally shout at passenger “Salli ganna, salli ganna”, gets partial blindness when cops get in. Ok most of them are probably cursing the coppers at the end of the day, but if they can let them ride free, why not clergy? I guess it depends on the moral standards of the bus conductor. Unfortunately it is non-existent in most of them.

5 Non Blondes

This is a cool mix up of Eminem and the 4 Non Blondes :D

Enjoy

The Chersterfield Hotel and LankaZone.com

** Launch of new site **

I mentioned in one of my earlier posts that a friend of mine launched a hotel in Nuwara Eliya, called the Chesterfield Hotel, and finally the web site is online. In addition to information about the hotel it offers information about Sri Lanka and about some other hotels in the country, and basically to promote Sri Lanka tourism to the world.

www.lankazone.com

So the next time you are planning a trip to Nuwara Eliya, make sure to check this place out.

Cheers!!!

Can People be this Stupid?

A conversation that happened in a Liquor store in Hawaii

Cashier: “Aloha, how are you today?”
Tourist: “Oh, I’m sorry, I don’t speak Spanish. Could you talk in English please?”
Cashier: “Hello, how are you today?”
Tourist: “Fine, we just flew here from America today.”
(The cashier rings up the tourist’s few items.)
Cashier: “That will be twenty five dollars and eighty five cents.”
Tourist: “Do you take American money here? I only have American money. I have not been able to get to the currency exchange yet.”
Cashier: “Ma’am, we are in the United States. We take dollars here.”
Tourist: “Oh really? You take this money?” *holds up her $20 bill*
Cashier: “Yes, ma’am, those are dollars, and being a US state we do accept those.”
Tourist: “Well that’s very nice of you to accept foreign money.”
Cashier: *puzzled* “Mahalo, have a great day!”
Tourist: *under her breath* “I told her I didn’t speak Spanish!”

Conversation between a Pizza parlor and a customer

Customer: “Hi, I ordered a pizza from you guys a while ago, and they delivered the wrong one.”
Operator: “Oh, I’m sorry! What was your order?”
Customer: “Mushrooms and green onions… the one we got had sausage. We can’t eat sausage! We’re vegetarians!”
Operator: “Okay, do you still have the pizza? We can come by and switch them for you.”
Customer: “No, we ate it.”
Operator: “You ate it?”
Customer: “Yes! Now, I’d like to get my money back. It was the wrong pizza.”
Operator: “So… you want me to give you your money back… for a pizza you already ate.”
Customer: “Well we didn’t LOOK at it, we just ate it.”

Tech Support

(Back story: the customer was getting a blue screen of death on their computer.)
Operator: “Hello, thank you for calling tech support. How can I help you today?”
Customer: “I was wondering if you could tell me who general failure is and why he is trying to read the C drive on my computer?”
Operator: “Ummm…excuse me?”
Customer: “I said that some guy named General Failure is reading my C drive.”
Operator: “…How did you come to this conclusion?”
Customer: “When I booted up my computer I get a big blue screen that says “General failure reading drive C,” and I demand to know who this person is!”
Operator: *stifling laughter* “Okay, if you don’t mind I am going to place you on hold for about 10 minutes while I do an investigation as to who this person is…”
(I placed customer on hold and told my co-workers. We laughed our asses off for 10 minutes.)
Operator: “Thank you for holding. I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is I was able to find some information for you. The bad news is that I wasn’t able to confirm who this ‘General Failure’ is; I am sure he doesn’t work for us. The other thing is that your hard drive is fried, and I would advise you to try to pull any data you can off the drive and invest in a new one. Is there anything else I can do for you today?”
Customer: “Um…no thank you.”

In a Supermarket

Customer: “What the f**k, you shortchanged me!”
Cashier: “Ma’am, I gave you the exact amount of change that is on the receipt.”
Customer: “BULLS**T! YOU SHORTCHANGED ME YOU STUPID LITTLE F**K! I DEMAND THAT YOU GIVE ME MY MONEY BACK RIGHT NOW!”
Cashier: “I’m sorry, ma’am. I will go get a manager for you right away.”
Customer: “F**K YOU, YOU LITTLE PIECE OH S**T! I WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS. YOU WILL PAY!”
(At this point the customer began to storm down the aisles. She lit a cigarette and began setting merchandise on fire. Afterwards she ran from the store because she realized that she had in fact had gotten the right amount of change!)

This were real conversation that had happened between customers and shopkeepers. There’s a whole site dedicated to these called http://notalwaysright.com/, and I seriously suggest everyone to go through them. :) It’s a great pick me upper when those blues kick in.

http://notalwaysright.com/

Cheers

Equation for Men and Women

Got this in email today. It’s true aint it? :)

----> Equation 1

Human = eat + sleep + work + enjoy
Donkey = eat + sleep

Therefore,
Human = Donkey + work + enjoy

Therefore,
Human - enjoy = Donkey + work

In other words,
Human that don't know enjoy = Donkey that work

----> Equation 2

Men = eat + sleep + earn money
Donkeys = eat + sleep

Therefore,
Men = Donkeys + earn money

Therefore,
Men - earn money = Donkeys

In other words,
Men that don't earn money = Donkeys

----> Equation 3

Women = eat + sleep + spend
Donkeys = eat + sleep

Therefore,
Women = Donkeys + spend

Therefore,
Women - spend = Donkeys

In other words,
Women that don't spend = Donkeys

----> To Conclude:

From Equation 2 and Equation 3
Men that don't earn money = Women that don't spend.

So, Men earn money not to let women become Donkeys! (Postulate 1)

And, Women spend not to let men become Donkeys! (Postulate 2)

So, we have?
Men + Women = Donkeys + earn money + Donkeys + spend money

Therefore from Postulates 1 and 2, we can conclude

Man + Woman = 2 Donkeys that live happily together!



Donkey Image: Rick Roach

It’s One of Those Days

Yep, one that right royally screws you up early in the morning.

I take the train in the morning coz I’m a fan of riding the rails, and I usually take the express coming from Matara, since it only stops at two of the stations out of the eight between where I get on and off. It’s about 15 minutes faster than a slow train. As I came to the stations it was announced that it will be 15 minutes late, which is not unusual. So there’s a slow train that goes right after the express and it came and left, then out of the blue another slow train comes up, with no sight of the express in sight. So a lot of the usual express crowd get on that one, including me. When it stopped at one of the stations, where the express also stops, some of the people got down saying that the express was right behind. If this is the case then the slow train is held up until the express passes, so thought why wait and got down. Five minutes go by, ten minutes go by, but still no express in sight. After about 15 minutes it slowly makes it way to the station, by which time the previous train, the one I got down from, so that I can go faster, might have already reached its destination. So what else to do but get on the late express, and what happens, the bleeding engine gives up and the train doesn’t budge. Yes how wonderful.

The thing is that if I had stayed on in the earlier train, then it would have been definitely stopped to let the express pass on, but since I got down, oh no everything has to go wonky. Mind you this station is about 2.5 km’s from the Galle Road, so you have to take another bus to get to the Galle raod. Waited for another half hour in hopes that the engine will start and we’d be merrily on our way, but no such luck. Because of this fiasco all trains coming behind are also stuck.

I wait for about half an hour and decided to take the bus, and guess what happens after the bust starts to go. Yep you are right, the broken train starts to move. I tell you my timing is way off today. Apparently they’ve brought in another engine to push the broken down one from behind. Well what else to do but go ahead in the bus, with all the traffic and all.

These railway people need to be taught a lesson in information dissemination. Would it kill them to let the passengers know if the problem is solvable or not, and give some kind of time estimate? Whether they are even trying to solve the problem or not?

Anyways wasted 3 hour on the road on what is normally a 1 hour commute. I usually come to office early so it didn’t really matter, still managed to come as same time as others. Luckily the office doesn’t have strict working hours and we can waltz in any time we please. :), but what about the other people who have to get in before the “Rathu Ira”?

Normally something like this would have really pissed me off, but funnily enough I was highly amused by all this, and laughing to myself. Two conclusions, either I’m becoming more Zen like or I’m totally losing it, and I sincerely hope it’s the first one.



Image Source: www.imagezoo.com

Sieben

(Ok couldn’t think of a witty title so Sieben = German for Seven)


Aiy caramba…been tagged again, to write up 7 weird facts about moi. Aye, such brutal honesty stuff makes me feel like I’m running nekid through a crowded street. Oh what the heck eh?

I’m supposed to display the rules as well. Don’t ask me why.

- Link your tagger and list these rules on your blog
- Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird.
- Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs.
- Let them know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog

Hmmm here goes…

- I have this imaginary fantasy world, a cross between LOTR and Star Wars (go figure), where I can have my own little adventures. I usually go there when I pissed off at the real world, which I find myself doing quite a lot recently.

- I’m not much of a talker. Talking bores the hell outa me, especially idle chit chat. What annoys me is that people mistake that, coupled with shyness, as being a stuck up snob, which I’m not. It’s just the way I am. However, come up with an interesting subject, and will talk for ages. Otherwise get me drunk as a skunk.

- I’m not comfortable with letting people get close to me.

- Had a thing for tattoos since I was a kid. Wasn’t until recently that I was able to get them done. Already have two, and the number will definitely go up.

- I have a feeling that even though the body is growing the mind stopped growing somewhere around the age of ten.

- Fascinated by mythology, the occult and the dark side of things. The light side is so overrated and boring.

- Most of the time I feel disconnected with the rest of the world, and funnily, it doesn’t bother me either.

Ok there we go. A selected few ;)

I’m going to be the evil one here and will not tag anyone else, not because i dont care about you, but mainly coz everyone I know has already been tagged and secondly, I want to see what curse will befall me Mwuahahaha…

I invite any one who wants to write up some facts about themselves and take up the tag.

Cheers y'all

Tom, Dick and Harry

Disclaimer: This is NOT a review!

It’s been awhile since I went for a play so thought I’d drag my lazy self to see the “Silent Hands” production of Ray and Michael Cooney’s Tom, Dick and Harry at the Wendt. If I’m correct this is not the first time they are doing it, but this time it’s for some worthy causes. The proceeds of the first night, Friday the 30th of May, went towards the vehicle fund of Methodists College and the Saturdays performance was in aid of the Welfare fund of St. Peters College. Don’t know about the third night :)

Well it was just what the doctor ordered to drive away the blues of a depressingly wet day. Laughed my head off from the beginning till the end of the show. It was a hilarious script, and wonderfully delivered by a great cast. Credit for Jehan Bastiens and Neidra Williams for a great job in adapting it with a local flavor, and directing the play.

A big round of applause for all the guy and gals for putting on a great show.

Cheers!!!